Aug 1, 2004: Tarot reading

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From my notes after the tarot reading:

Somehow I feel like I've gone on some variation of the traditional journey. [Did I make made a detour and visit the minor arcana as well? maybe this is why there were so many unusual cards in my reading] It seems more like it has something to do with sensuality and sexuality (and maybe femininity); perhaps this is so strong in the environment (or becoming that way) that it's changing things

Interpretations originally from Crystal Reflections and D'Agostino.

Significator (that is, me): King of Swords. a moderately dark mature male, very imaginative, firm in friendship; difficult to persuade; has many artistic talents; tends to complete whatever he initiates. Authority - a focused, determined, intentional mind filled with clarity of purpose and strong will which offers excellent counsel and is most reliable. Mental, assertive, a perfectionist. Defender/protector, philosophical, studious, alert, direct - a knowledgeable leader. Tactician, soldier, father of ideas and ideals. Good planner. Ruled by the drive of necessity. Teacher, mentor, researcher. Highly informed, courageous.

How are you using your ability to be rational, logical and analytical? Who is judging or criticizing you?

Covering me (the present) Two of Wands Reversed. Your true challenge is your own boredom - this lack of a new direction or stimuli. Have more patience, don't spoil things by being over anxious. You have lived in this unpleasant, unsatisfying situation long enough - it is time to make a change!

What two ideas are you bringing together in a new and different way? What conflicting desires do you wish to integrate? At what threshold do you stand? What options do you have?

Crossing me (opposing forces, good or bad): Page of Cups. A message, an offer of help and cooperation; energy which has moved through possessiveness, manipulation and jealousy and mastered the capacity to offer emotional loyalty to others in objective ways. A gentle, quiet person - emotionally secure and able to communicate feelings, desires and concerns in realistic and meaningful ways. The development of wonderful ideas and psychic abilities through meditation and study, developed in a peaceful way. An important messages will be arriving soon - be ready to start a new project. Continually express your feelings - purify yourself emotionally.

Emotional, sensitive, creative, resourceful, loyal, affectionate, ruled by the drive for the transformation. Will be of beneficial service to the Querent. The transformation side of emotional opportunities, situations, events and guides. The fountain of emotional youth. “If it is a favorable card, the opposing forces will not be serious”

The heart of the matter: Two of Swords: You are stalemated in your affairs and you don't know which direction to go next. There is no confusion here - you have deliberately closed your eyes so that you will not have to choose. You seek to maintain calm through your balanced rationality, which causes you to deny your intuitions. Recognize that when you are unable to see your options - your rationality is of no help. Stop trying to "force" things to happen prematurely. Mental clarity and balance may require removing yourself from the action. Get away from it all to see the truth and in this state of detachment and non-involvement, you can see with non-judgmental awareness.

Passing away: Four of Wands. You have done well, perfected your work and you will know harmony, satisfaction and peace. Make plans to enjoy the results of your hard work.perfection largely due to personal labor; successful completion of enterprise; favor of powerful persons; respected, fortunate, ambitious, an advocate of innovation for improvements; gain through friends and travel. [From my personal perspective this is probably that the benefits of my PREfix/PREfast success winding down….]

What role is "ritual" or ceremony playing in your life? What have you integrated into your life? What Rite of Passage are you experiencing and how are you celebrating it? What are you celebrating?

May happen in future: Queen of Swords. A moderately dark mature female; nental, assertive, perfectionist, protective, ambitious mother. Mother of solutions, philosophical, studious, alert, confident; intensely perceptive; fond of luxuries; sexually attractive to men; a natural ability to get things done; demanding of others; yet at times very sympathetic and understanding. Sharp wit - a serious, good counselor who can give the right kind of help - having developed great spiritual depth through prolonged struggle, which reflects the mastery of a fair, objective, rational mind. She symbolizes the connection between sorrow and wisdom - having faced sorrow with courage, acceptance and honesty, she has found wisdom. She uses her intellect to free herself from confusion, doubt and fear. Here is the source of the will to achieve, to maximize the potential of the self.

How are you utilizing your mental and communicative abilities? Who is helping you see the alternatives by pointing things out to you in a rational, perhaps critical way? How are you being discriminating and analytical?

Near future: King of Cups. Emotional loyalty - unconditional love and commitment - the ability to give emotional comfort, support and positive regard to others. Qualities of generosity, reliability, respect - one who provides wise counseling with much empathy. Balance of your imagination and discipline is essential now - lighten up and have some fun. Emotional, sensitive, creative, dedicated, motivated, sensual/sexy - tender, soothing, loving. Confident, involved in the arts.

My fears: Eight of swords reversed: Begin your freedom - take off the blindfold and allow yourself to see clearly how you have created the situation you are experiencing - liberate yourself from this oppressive situation. Spontaneously utilize your creativity/ imagination and your logic/reason - combine these elements of your mind. Are you working in the right arena, on the right projects? What actions, plans or ideas are being blocked by circumstances beyond your control? What is interfering with your creative expressions?

My environment: Wheel of fortune reversed: What life-changes are you experiencing? How are you adapting to these changes? Re-evaluate your abilities. Analyze everything and ask yourself - "Will I benefit by this experience?" Keep planting seeds - you never know which ones will blossom and they all may blossom in time. How are your horizons expanding? How do you measure success?

My hopes: 7 of swords reversed. Someone may be offering you the advice and help you need. Your situation isn't half as bad as you "think" it is. Stop sabotaging yourself - release this "yes-but" attitude. You KNOW what you want - stop trying to convince yourself that you can not have it. Open your mind, release the blocks - free your imagination and satisfy your curiosity. What is confusing you? What can you do to drop your defenses and become more open?

Final outcome: The moon. Aim to evoke a conscious desire to go further than intelligence - the understanding of that which is and decide to make a "leap" into pure and simply creativity. Intuition of faith - participation in the becoming of what is to be. Bring inner ecstasy back into your consciousness. Allow your intuitive powers to guide you - the change has come, even though it does not show.

In the beginning, your unconscious and your intelligence have so little in common that communication is entirely through "dreams" - the state of consciousness where intelligence remains passive. This communication is extended to the waking state and finally, no longer unconscious - your intelligence and wisdom unite in the conscious state of "intuition".

What do you instinctively want to do? What kind of cycle or pattern are you repeating? Are your actions appropriate to this particular situation or are you responding to some past situation? What is bewildering or confusing you? What is real and what is illusion?

See also: Blue Moon 2004 Tarot Reading, 78 Keys interpretation

For additional tarot readings, see Reading on burn night 2006, Once in a blue moon, there's an embarrassment of riches, and Tarot readings